Because marriage is interesting, yet awesome at the same time, I send you this letter from 5 years in the future.
According to anniversary.us.com, you and your husband are no longer newlyweds. As of June 13th 2015, you are, in fact, an old married couple. Yup, you're still married. Do you know what old married couples give each other after enduring a solid 5 years of blood, sweat and tears?
And no...not the dirty type of 'wood,' I mean the grow-from-the-group-chopped-down-and-made-into-something-unique wood. Five years of companionship and in the end, it's all reduced down to the worth of a fine handcrafted wood product. I appreciate a fine crafted bird house or jewelry box just as much as another, but after five years and a new baby...I think I'd rather take the dirty wood.
You 'wood' too.
I wish I could write you something motivation and super deep about everything you'll learn over the next five years of marriage. How you'll grown so much as a couple and all the sacrifices you'll make to get to this point in your relationship, but I can't. One, I'm not a super deep person (you know that). And two, the next five years are fun and enjoyable. Sure, you'll have bad times, but when you go to write this letter in 5 years, you won't remember what they were.
You took the liberty to marry your BFF and well, you both are still exactly that. Cheers to a happy five years!
Now, I do have some advice to give. It's the sort of stuff that will ward off stupid fights and drama, and if you know whats best for you, you'll listen!
13 Tips for My New Married Self
- Just clean the dang litter box like you said you will. You wanted a cat. You begged for one. And you'll end up sticking your husband with the job of cleaning it. Avoid the avoidable and scoop the poop.
- Men need man time. Don't bug him if he stays out late (besides, 11pm isn't late...until after you have a baby). If you want a happy husband, give him ample bonding with other men. You'll be content sitting at home watching Netflix and crocheting, crafting, sewing or whatever you'll be doing.
- With that in mind, take as much girl time as you need! Treat yo'self...within budget because yal will be dead broke the first couple of years.
- If he wants to smoke a cigar. Let him be a man and smoke the dang cigar. You are not in charge of his health, though, you may grace him with your thoughts so he knows how you feel. Let him be a big boy and decide for himself.
- You wanted the dog, so try to take the dog out to potty more than he does.
- Don't let him make the bed alone. You both sleep in the bed. Help him make the freakin' bed!
- Try to keep your girl crap picked up off the bathroom sink (makeup, brushes, random liquids and cosmetics). You'll get your own bathroom soon enough, but until that happens - life will be much more peaceful if you keep your crap from burying the bathroom sink.
- If you're going to let food go bad, don't buy it.
- Don't leave wadded up paper towels, tissues or napkins around the apartment. Or any trash in general. It's gross. You were not born in a barn.
- Double, tripple, and quadruple check that you turned the oven/stove off after dinner! You can't afford to bake the oven for 8 hours overnight, twice.
- Since we're talking about electricity, you don't have to leave every light on. Turn them off when you leave the room. That's just good etiquette.
- But, if you want to turn the A/C on, turn it on! The must-be-eighty-plus-degrees-in-the-apartment-first rule is stupid. Happy wife, happy life.
- And finally, remember to love, cherish and enjoy life with your husband! He cares for you more than you can ever imagine. One day, he will father your children, and you will grow more in love with each other each day. Every day is a gift from God and we never know how many more we will get.
Your Five-Year-Married Self